Probably what i felt was quite embarrassing and took me about eight to twelve months to open up to anybody about was a had a voice in my head that honestly was messing with my head so much it’s unreal.
It hit me that hard i felt about just ending everything , When the doctors told me don’t touch alcohol because it can mess with you medication Honestly when i was in the wrong frame of mind I felt like buying some just to see what damage i could do to myself because i just didn’t care about what happened to me.
When i was in a dark place that voice told me to do some stupid things. I just hope everyone who reads this doesn’t judge me for what did actually happen but i used to play a game crossing the road where i would let a car go past and see how close i could get to it , because of not thinking straight i never thought about what would happen if that car actually hit me
Fortunately it never got as serious as what was going through my mind. I could be stood somewhere and end up arguing with myself should i do this should i do that. Until it started to click when talking to my mum and dad telling me how do you think it would effect the family if i did something like that.
One we had that long chat they helped me. They seriously helped me get of the ledge what i felt was the best place to be and the reason i didn’t mention anything was because i didn’t want them to just think he’s just attention seeking. They took it very serious and i’m glad i opened up to them , they were very understanding and supportive.
One of the things i’m pleased about is they helped me speak to someone and since talking to someone iv’e not had those thoughts anymore.